Stop Doing Slave Things

Last weekend, my sister, brother, and mother visited us and we really enjoyed each other's company. We visited Atlanta area colleges so that my sister, who graduates in a year, could get an idea of where she might like to attend. I had no idea, until Saturday, that my sister still does slave things. Please allow me to elaborate.

Saturday morning, my sister asked me if I had some grease. "Grease?", I asked. "You mean, cooking oil?" "No", my sister replied. "Hair grease." Seriously, black people, are there really some of you out there who still believe you need grease to straighten or maintain the straightness of your hair? I explained that I do not use grease and have had the same can of oil sheen for six years. Moreover, I don't use grease laden products. Please allow me to enlighten you. All you need is heat. We figured out, oh about a decade or so ago, that grease is not only unnecessary, it is damaging to hair follicles. I also learned that my sister still uses sponge rollers, which strip the hair of moisture and lead to breakage, particularly if you do not use grease. So, I guess in her case, she really does need grease since she is still using sponge rollers. They still sell those?

On to my next slave like behavior. My mother, and many mothers and aunts across America, still eat slave food. At least once a month, she is cooking greens, pinto beans, or some slave food like that. Now, we do not consume swine and have not since 1992, so I would consider my folks to be evolved slaves, but slaves nonetheless. Come on black people. We have a black president and I don't expect him to pull the grill onto the lawn of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. So please, expand your horizons, stop using hair grease, stop cooking black eyed peas, and stop doing slave things. Us is free now.